Sunday, October 25, 2009

"Sam I Am Is I Was Me"

On this day one year ago, I was up running around, making sure every last detail was perfect. I was by far, a complete mess. My stomach had "butterflies", my heart sat in my throat like a huge lump and emotional wouldn't even begin to describe the state I was in. I was about to join with Sam as one person. Sam was and still is my best friend. So I thought what better way to celebrate today than to write about him.

I met Sam almost four years ago through a mutual friend. He was this incredible little ball of energy. He was facing many demons at the time, yet he had this enormous heart. He was so friendly and just a blessing to be around. People were naturally attracted to him. When he walked in the room, everyone was drawn to his electric personality. At that time I never imagined I was looking at the man God had created just for me.

Sam and I started Epic together literally when they first opened the doors. After being there for maybe a month, Sam was asked to join the Tech team. He absolutely loved it. Before Epic, Sam had never been exposed to church. Me, on the other hand, had been in and out of church my entire life. Everything was so new to him. It was amazing watching him grow spiritually. Sam is and has been completely sold out to the Epic vision since day one. Sam is a volunteer on the Dream Team at Epic. He has been showing up every Sunday for the past two years and every single time stays for all three services, sometimes working them by himself. Even when I go in the hospital, he will stay with me on Saturday night and then wake up around 5 am on Sunday and drive home just to make it to service. He has a drive that is unbelievable. Sometimes I have no clue how he does it. It by far is a passion for him. Sam was baptized for the first time in his life ever this year at Epic. It was such an emotional experience for me. I believe each of us has a story. Sams is truly one that will blow you away. To know where he came from, the path he was on, and where he stands today is a true testament to God's mercy and love.

He supports me and he loves me. He goes to work for us each week so he can provide everything we need. He goes above and beyond at work, doing extras for the doctors and his coworkers. Most of the time things that go unnoticed, but he continues doing them anyway. He gives God all the glory and takes none for himself, which to me blows my mind daily.

We have such a unique marriage because I am sick. Sam stepped into my life, knowing the hardships that were to come and loves me completely and fully each day anyway. On the days I can't get out of bed, he helps me. He never once complains. When I feel like crying and screaming because I can't quit coughing, he holds me as tight as he can. There are days it feels like he literally breathes for me. He gets out of bed on his only days off and takes Peyton to school so I don't have to. He hired a housekeeper so I wouldn't be stressed and feel inadequate from not being able to handle all of the housework. When I go to the hospital, he stays every single night possible with me, holding my hand and pushing me along the way to get better. He has been there with me when I am coughing up blood and not sure what the future is going to bring for me. He completely supports me with the book I am writing. He is so patient never hurrying me to finish it, knowing I will finish it in my own time. There have been several times when I have been sick and because of the physical limited activity I could do he carried me on his back when he noticed I was taking short breaths. He loves my daughter as if she were his own. He has told me time and time again, he truly believes God created her with him in mind, even though he wasn't in the picture at the time. He is a man of God. It isn't something he tells you, it is just something that radiates off of him.

It is an honor to get to walk beside him in this life. I truly believe that God created us for each other. That our story together was planned long before we ever imagine. He is me and I am him. His victories are my victories and his defeats are my defeats. He is everything I dreamed of as a little girl and more. I love his drive to be productive and adore his heart that wants to help those in need. He never meets a stranger. He always has a smile. He is truly my best friend. I am overwhelmed today as I look back at our journey thus far, for I have been blessed beyond my wildest dreams. =)

Monday, October 12, 2009

Pumpkins and Life

It is that time of year once again. The air is cooler and everything that was once green is now beginning to turn beautiful tones of reds, yellows and oranges. This is by far Sam's favorite time of the year. We have all of the Halloween decorations up and ready. I must say, we have more Halloween decorations than any other family I know. This year we pulled 3 giant plastic tubs and four big boxes out of storage, as well as Sam's favorite, his black Christmas tree with a skull base. Yes Halloween is near. We usually celebrate this time of year with several trips to haunted houses. The rain has held us up quite a bit however we plan on venturing out this weekend, rain or not. The rain has put a damper on our holiday cheer. I know I talk of Halloween like it is Christmas. You must understand to my husband, it is exactly like that, if not better. He absolutely adores Halloween. We definitely take it a step further than the typical family. I must say, it does feel somewhat like I am a member of the Addams family at times. It is all in good fun though.

I do wish the rain would stop. I have just about made the decision to build an ark. Our yard is a mess and I don't even know when we will be able to cut the grass again. At this rate, not anytime soon. Of course since the weather has been nasty, it is soccer season. Those usually fall together. Peyton is playing her second year. She loves it so much. I never realized she was going to be a little athlete. She is so good and is one of the fastest runners on her team. She scored the first goal of the first game of the season this year. She did the same thing last year. At her last game, I asked her to help carry our folding chairs. After she strapped one over her shoulder I realized how small she looked, so I offered to carry them both. She looked at me and said, "Mom, I can handle it, I am a soccer player, not a ballerina." Haha I love her so much.

The month of October leaves us many things to celebrate. Our one year anniversary is on October 25th. It is so exciting to know it is right around the corner!! I completely and totally adore Sam more now than I did on the day I married him. The two of us work so well together. We have built our marriage around the foundation of God's word and that helps so much. We both firmly believe that when we were married we were joined together as one flesh. We do have struggles from time to time however we work together daily as a team. It is more evident now than it has ever been that he is who I dreamed of as a little girl. Some days, I wake up and look at the life I am living and think to myself, how did I ever get so lucky? God truly saw fit to bless me immensely.

We are leaving November 1st for Severville, Tn. We are staying in the exact same cabin we stayed in last year for our honeymoon. We will be gone 7 days and six nights.Our cabin is located on the peak of a mountain with a breathtaking view. We are both like kids on Christmas morning...counting down the days. We CANNOT wait!!!! I will be sure to post up pictures.

We have been so blessed these past few months. God has by far been at work in our lives and we are so thankful. Life is good. =)